I am endlessly fascinated and amused by the mysteries of the cosmos and my tiny place in it. Enjoy my explorations of my inner and outer worlds.
Run Away, Run Away!
I ran away for the first time in Kindergarten. Standing in line after school with all the other kids waiting for the stupid bus, I had the existential realization that life is too short to wait for a bus and decided I needed to explore the world. When the nun turned...
The Workaholic Universe
I am having lunch with an old friend. Just as he is bemoaning all the goings on of his collapsing marriage, the phone rings. His cell phone that is. "Excuse me," he purses his lips in that embarrassed “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe I left my cellphone on” smile. ...
The Treadmill of Existence
I’m told that a treadmill affords people the possibility of movement and exercise that would not be available because of weather or other circumstances. Yet every time I see someone walking or running, getting nowhere, I experience a poignant tug, somewhere between...
Brain Food
Of course I love my husband Ron. And I know he loves me. But for thirty eight years, we’ve danced around the kitchen trying to reconcile our different relationships to food. As is always the case, it’s more than just about eating. I imagine Freud and Jung sitting in...
Workin’ It
So why do we work? My mini-retirement was enough to show me that it provides me an anchor of meaning. A recent article in the NY Times examined retirement vs. working into old age. “In 2000, after a long career at the helm of a commercial printing firm, Arline Tarte, now 71, left the industry for good. For two years, she played bridge, went to the theater and ballet, saw jazz concerts. But she says she found it uninspiring at best. ‘I was used to doing all that and running a company that was very involved,’ she said. ‘It was boring.’
Going Nowhere
“The world thus appears as a complicated tissue of events, in which connections of different kinds alternate or overlap or combine and thereby determine the texture of the whole.” (Heisenberg, Physics and Philosophy, 1963) When you walk through the Northwest Airlines...
I’m So Rich
I look around my home office and realize that almost everything was given to me. Galen gave me the glow in the dark rosary blessed by the Pope. Yael gave me the “hamsa” that hangs over the door, a Middle Eastern guard against the evil eye. The framed photograph of...
To Stress or Not To Stress?
In a recent TED talk, psychologist Kelly McGonigal proposed that we suffer from stress because we believe that stress is….stressful
Head Banging and Other Habits
I call him Joe. Every morning during my meditation, he begins his ritual. He flies to my living room window and stands on the clothesline hook, staring at his reflection; his arch enemy, his evil twin, looking out at him from the glass. Then he begins. Bang....
Brush Up Your Shakespeare
“To pay or not to pay, that is the question.” I was sure Shakespeare had created Hamlet. The dark Dane, the brooding Prince of existential angst seems quintessential Bard. Hamlet is the most translated, quoted and performed play in the history of the world. It’s...
Lavinia Plonka weaves together 33 autobiographical stories with weighty philosophical questions in her uniquely hilarious way: Are aliens stealing our time? Can one find enlightenment at Sam’s Club? Are nail salons a galactic conspiracy?
These essays originally appeared as Lavinia’s monthly column, “CosmiComedy,” in Western North Carolina Woman Magazine.
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